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Irish Jokes

Where are you callin' from

|Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend Finney. "Did...

 

"E I E I O."

|It was general question time on the "Top of the World" quiz show and the host first asked the Hungarian contestant: "Complete this line of a song and spell...

 

McNally

|McNally was taking his first plane ride, flying over the Rocky Mountains. The stewardess handed him a piece of chewing gum. "It's to keep your ears from...

 

I was pushing it

|Kelly was standing in front of Cohan's Tavern when he saw a driverless car rolling slowly down the street. He ran to the car, jumped in, and pulled on the...

 

Murphy said to his daughter

|Murphy said to his daughter, "I want you home by eleven o'clock." She said, "But Father, I'm no longer a child!" He said, "I know, that's why I want you...

 

The worm's got a salmon by the throat

|MacAndrews was visiting his Irish cousin, O'Bannon. While there he decided to do a bit of fishing. As he sat there on afternoon, his cousin walked by."What...

 

Clean Humor

|It seems three Irishmen, Sean, Michael and Tim, passed over at the same time. Upon encountering the Pearly Gates, they were met by ST. Patrick himself, and...

 

Irishman, Englishman and a German

|Irishman, Englishman and a German are caught in Saudi Arabia drinking. "Under Saudi law you are sentenced to 30 lashes then deported. Before you begin you...

 

An American and an Irishman

|An American and an Irishman were enjoying a ride in the country when they came upon an unusual sight - an old gallows. The American thought he would have a...

 

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman

|An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman were without tickets for the opening ceremonies of the summer Olympics but hoped to be able to talk their way in...

 

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