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Military Jokes

Giving sad news to a troop

|The Captain called the Sergeant in. "Sarge, I just got a telegram that Private Jones' mother died yesterday. Better go tell him and send him in to see me."...

 

Requesting a three day pass

|An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you...

 

Giving very odd excuses

|The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily. "Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it...

 

Change your course now

|This is the transcript of an actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October, 1995.Radio...

 

Recruiting any and all pilots

|The chief of staff of the US Air Force decided that he would personally intervene in the recruiting crisis affecting all of our armed services. He directed...

 

Bragging about old times

|Two men were boasting to each other about their old army days."Why, my outfit was so well drilled," declared one, "that when they presented arms all you...

 

My men are very brave

|General McKenzie was in charge of the Navy, and he was visiting his colleague General Marshall, who was in charge of the Army. McKenzie arrives at the...

 

Speaking with the general

|It was a dark, stormy, night. The Marine was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty.A General stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous...

 

Reward these soldiers for their work

|A British General had sent some of his men off to fight for their country in the Falkland Island Crisis.Upon returning to England from the South American...

 

Practical joke on his ex-girlfriend

|The soldier serving in Hong Kong was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their engagement and asking for her photograph back.He went out and...

 

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