Miscellaneous
Low Sperm Count
A 70 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a sample...
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God's Gifts
Seems God was just about done creating the universe, but he had two things left in his bag of creations, so he decided to split them between Adam and Eve. He...
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Grass Sandwich
At a local college dance, a guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In...
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Genius Boyfriend
A worried father confronted his daughter one night. "I don't like that new boyfriend, he's rough and common and bloody stupid with it." "Oh no, Daddy," the...
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Making Love to a Woman
MAKING COFFEE Making a cup of coffee is like making love to a beautiful woman. It's got to be hot. You've got to take your time. You've got to stir.. gently,...
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Excuse Me, Your Fly Is Unzipped
1. "The cucumber has left the salad." 2. "Someone tore down the wall, and your Pink Floyd is hanging out." 3. "Your soldier ain't so unknown now." 4....
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Hypothetically Speaking
A little boy goes up to his father and asks: "Dad, what's the difference between hypothetical and reality?" The father replies: "Well son, I could give you...
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First Thing to do after Jail
Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years. The day he got out, his wife and son were there to pick him up. He came through the gates and got into the car. The...
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Math Lesson
A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read: "Dear wife, You must realize that you are 54 years old and I have certain needs which you are no...
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Crowded Subway
The subway car was packed. It was rush hour, and many people were forced to stand. One particularly cramped woman turned to the man behind her and said,...
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