Stats/Math Jokes

Log negative one zero

|Theorem: log(-1) = 0Proof:a. log[(-1)^2] = 2 * log(-1)On the other hand:b. log[(-1)^2] = log(1) = 0Combining a) and b) gives:2* log(-1) = 0Divide both sides...

 

Proof E equal to one

|Theorem: e=1Proof:2*e = f2^(2*pi*i)e^(2*pi*i) = f^(2*pi*i)e^(2*pi*i) = 1Therefore:2^(2*pi*i) = f^(2*pi*i)2=fThus:e=1

 

One equal to one half

|Theorem: 1 = 1/2:Proof:We can re-write the infinite series 1/(1*3) + 1/(3*5) + 1/(5*7) + 1/(7*9)+...as 1/2((1/1 - 1/3) + (1/3 - 1/5) + (1/5 - 1/7) + (1/7 -...

 

Crocodile is longer

|Prove that the crocodile is longer than it is wide.Lemma 1. The crocodile is longer than it is green: Let's look at the crocodile. It is long on the top and...

 

Math is turning bad

|"Psst, c'mere," said the shifty-eyed man wearing a long black trenchcoat, as he beckoned me off the rainy street into a damp dark alley. I followed."What...

 

Refrigerate elephants

|Analysis:1. Differentiate it and put into the refrig. Then integrate it in the refrig.2. Redefine the measure on the referigerator (or the elephant).3....

 

Two plus two is five

|"First and above all he was a logician. At least thirty-five years of the half-century or so of his existence had been devoted exclusively to proving that...

 

Debate about the box

|An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced-in area for some sheep, but they have a limited amount of building material. The...

 

Story about infinity

|A very large mathematical convention was held in Las Vegas. The conventioneers filled two hotels, each with an infinite number of rooms. The hotels were...

 

The math one-liners

|Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]. If parallel lines meet at infinity - infinity must be a very noisy place with all those lines...