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Bar Jokes

What causes people to have arthritis?

|A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a...

 

The customs of an Irishman

|An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he...

 

You can't bring that dog in this bar

|A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!" The guy, without...

 

The story of a very short man

|A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them...

 

I'm just trying to be helpful

|A good samaritan was walking home late one night when he came upon this drunk on the sidewalk. Wanting to help, he asked the drunk "do you live here?"...

 

They are stopped by the police

|John and Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the police. The officer told John that he was stopped because his...

 

A seal visits a local bar

|A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.The bartender asks the seal, "What's your pleasure?"The seal replies, "Anything but Canadian Club."

 

A man takes the ferry home from work

|John Smith lived in Staten Island, New York and worked in Manhattan. He had to take the ferryboat home every night. One evening, he got down to the ferry...

 

Female hormones in beer

|Yesterday, scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men...

 

A very depressed man

|There's a man sitting at a bar just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half an hour. Then, a big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him,...

 

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