Police Jokes

Judge has some fun

|A judge grew tired of seeing the same town drunk in front of his bench. One day the judge glared down at the man, who was still intoxicated, and thundered...

 

Excuse for speeding

|A cop pulls a car over on the highway for speeding. When he asks for the driver's license, the driver argued, "Speeding??? But officer, I was only trying to...

 

Warning all shoplifters

|Warning to shoplifters: Anyone caught shoplifting will be beaten, gagged, whipped and tortured. Any survivors will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

 

Request before death

|A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed."Have you any last requests? asked the chaplain."Yes," replied the murderer. "Will you...

 

Very stupid robbers

|Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first one said, "I hear sirens. Jump!"The second one said, "But we're on the 13th floor!"The first one screamed back,...

 

Chatting on the plane

|A man was recently flying to New York. He decided to strike up a conversation with his seat mate."I've got a great policeman joke. Would you like to hear...

 

The new CIA agents

|Three men are going through CIA training, trying to become secret agents. They finally got through all their written and physical tests when they are pulled...

 

Purchasing the brain

|A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices.The doctor said, "Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain...

 

Policemen in Heaven

|St Peter is standing at heaven's gate when a man walks up."Welcome to heaven my son. What did you do with your life?""I was a policeman," he responded."What...

 

Charged for speeding

|A man was speeding down a Alabama highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got...