Animal Jokes

The plumber has arrived

|A lady was expecting the plumber; he was supposed to come at ten o'clock. Ten o'clock came and went; no plumber; eleven o'clock, twelve o'clock, one...

 

The cat's chalkboard assignments

|In order to punish your cat for poor behavior, here are a list of items that the cat may write on a chalkboard. A. Fill in the blanks1. [xxx] is not...

 

The preacher buys a parrot

|A preacher is buying a parrot."Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher."Oh absolutely. It's a religious parrot," the storekeeper...

 

A burglar is in big trouble

|A burglar has just made it into the house he's intending ransacking, and he's looking around for stuff to steal. All of a sudden, a little voice pipes up,...

 

An amazing talking dog

|A man and his dog walk into a bar. The man proclaims, "I'll bet you a round of drinks that my dog can talk."Bartender: "Yeah! Sure...go ahead."Man: "What...

 

Baby bear wants to live somewhere else

|The three bears had been having some trouble recently and had ended up in family court. Mama and Papa bear were splitting up, and baby bear had to decide...

 

Instrument flying guide for animal lovers

|Having detailed the concept of attitude control, there is another method which you may prefer. For reasons that will become apparent, it is recommended for...

 

Two roaches having a discussion

|Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley when one engages a discussion about a new restaurant."I was in that new restaurant across the street," said...

 

This is one smart dog

|A butcher is leaning on the counter toward the close of day when a dog with a basket in its jaws comes pushing through the door."An' wot's this then?" he...

 

A dog's chalkboard assignments

|This list of chalkboard assignments may be used for your dog when he does not behave well. The below variations and choices will help you pick an...