Funny Jokes

yesterday's coffee

She's like yesterday's coffee -- a little weak in the bean.


own mind

He says he has a mind of his own. He's welcome to it-- who else would want it?


bone specialist

He should study to be a bone specialist -- he has the head for it.


his mind

He has one of those mighty minds -- mighty empty. He has a one-track mind, and the traffic on it is very light


insults part 1

He has a one-track mind, and the traffic on it is very light. He paid $500 to have his family tree searched, and found out he was the sap. There are times he...


insults part 2

He's so dumb, he thinks the Kentucky Derby is a hat. He's never slept with his wife. He says it isn't honorable to sleep with a married woman. He's so dumb,...



You're so poor that when I went to your house I stepped on a match and your mom said, "Oh! who turned off the fireplace"!!!


family vehicle

your family is so poor.......... the family vehicle is a skateboard.


What's that thing on your Neck?

Oh my God!!! What's that big ugly thing on your neck?! Oh, it's just your head.


Whoa! Shut your mouth!!!

Your breath is so bad that when you talk your teeth duck.