Animal Jokes

I think that I'm a chicken

|Psychiatrist: What's your problem?Patient: I think I'm a chicken.Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?Patient: Ever since I was an egg!

 

This dog is acting bad

|While waiting for a bus, the blind man's dog decided to go to the bathroom all over the blind man's legs.A passerby commented to the blind man, "What! That...

 

Cat technical support problems

|This is an actual account by a worker at a technical support and service center. One particular customer had an old console-type machine with a print head...

 

Investigating a terrible accident

|There was a terrible bus accident. Unfortunately, no one survived the accident except a monkey which was on board and there were no witnesses. The police...

 

Animals Q & A

|Q: Diner: I can't eat this chicken. Call the manager.A: Waiter: It's no use. He can't eat it either.Q: Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?A: The...

 

Your Cat Has Learned Your Internet Password

|9. E-mail flames from some guy named "Fluffy." 8. Traces of kitty litter in your keyboard. 7. You find you've been subscribed to strange newsgroups like...

 

Nine things dogs don't understand

|1. It's not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m. 2. It's wrong to back Grandma into a corner and guard her. 3. He shouldn't jump on your bed when he's...

 

Buy alligator shoes

|A man was on holiday in the depths of Louisiana, where he tried to buy some Alligator shoes. However he was not prepared to pay the high prices, and after...

 

Cow on train tracks

|A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside."What's going on?" she yells out...

 

Two angry neighbors

|Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill's yard. For one whole...