Bar Jokes
Where is this bus going?
|A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman.She looks the man up and down and says, "I've got...
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Three vampires go to a bar
|Three vampires walk into a bar and sit down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks the first vampire what he would like. The first vampire responds,...
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Does your dog bite?
|A man walks into a pub and sits down next to a man with a dog at his feet. "Does your dog bite?""No."A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of...
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A golf club visits a local bar
|A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club."You'll be driving...
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I am afraid of that tarmac
|A motorway walks into a pub one day. He goes up to the bar and orders himself a drink. He just sits down when in walks a strip of tarmac. The motorway sees...
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I don't owe anything for this drink
|The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, "What'll you have?" The guy answers, "A scotch, please." The bartender hands him the drink, and says "That'll...
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A brain goes to a local bar
|A brain walks into a bar and says, "I'll have a pint of beer please."The barman looks at him and says "Sorry, I can't serve you.""Why not?" askes the...
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The wife is not speaking to me
|One night, this guy come into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. Then he asks for another. After a couple more drinks, the bartender gets...
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If she went out with me
|A man had been out in the back woods for weeks, cutting logs. He was a bit scruffy and didn't smell very good. Finally he needed a break and came in to town...
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Who gave you those black eyes?
|A regular at Bob's Bar came in one evening sporting a matched pair of swollen black eyes that appeared extremely painful."Whoa, Sam!" said the bartender....
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