Funny Instruction Labels
These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods: On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!
) On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!
) On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?
) On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's 'just' a suggestion!
) On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! you lose!
) On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.
) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?
) (Whose body?
) On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.
) On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!
) On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (hmm.
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something must have gotten lost in the translation.
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) On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.
) On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.
) On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (but no peas?
) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (somebody got paid big bucks to write this one.
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) On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Raise your hand if you've tried this.
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) On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.
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