Men's Thesaurus
The new Men's Thesaurus - on sale now at your local book stores!
:"I'M GOING FISHING"Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid,
and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."IT'S A GUY THING"Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical"."CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR.
.."Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response."IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"Means: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."Means: "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".
Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completelyclueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"Means: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU."
"I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."
"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
we have more jokes here... check this out
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- What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy...
- A woman goes into a bar and orders a beer...
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