Miscellaneous
Redneck At The Bar
A bartender was washing glasses one afternoon when an elderly Irishman came in. With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool,...
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How to Know where a Driver is from
One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: New York One hand on wheel, one finger out window: Chicago One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on...
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Southern Comments
Exclamations: "Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!" "Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit." Threats: "I'll slap you so hard, your clothes will be...
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Valentines, Redneck Style
Kudzu is green, my dog's name is Blue And I'm so lucky to have a sweet thang like you. Yore hair is like cornsilk, a-flapping in the breeze. Softer than...
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You Must Be A Redneck If
* You recycle your own toilet paper * Your mom has to shave more times a month than your dad * You see a bill board that says "Don't do crack" and it reminds...
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Elevator Magic
A hillbilly family took a vacation to New York City. One day, the father took his son into a large building. They were amazed by everything they saw,...
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My Rules
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what...
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Dearest Wife
It seems there was this couple from Minneapolis, Minnesota, who decided to go to Miami Beach for a few days to thaw out during one particularly cold winter....
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Drinking, Gambling, and Golf
A man was walking in the city, when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking bum who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. The man...
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Respectfully Cheating
Jack and Betty are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. "Betty, I was wondering -- have you ever cheated on me?" "Oh Jack, why would you ask such a...
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