Miscellaneous
A Prayer Before Dying
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
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25 Fun Pool Activities
1) Stand on top of the high board and say you won't come down until your demands are met. 2) Tell the lifeguards that they aren't doing their jobs because...
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Coffee Addiction
You know you are addicted to coffee if -You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. -You sleep with your eyes open. -You have to watch videos in fast-forward....
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Clever Teacher
A high school English teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being there tomorrow. I might...
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Signs That You're Broke
At communion you go back for seconds. You think of a lottery ticket as an investment. You're formulating a plan to rob the food bank. Long distance companies...
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Feel Better
Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying. She...
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51 Ways to Annoy Everybody
1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn't matter which. 2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes. 3) Pretend to be from...
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Biting Nails
Two golden-agers were discussing their husbands over tea. "I do wish that my Elmer would stop biting his nails. He makes me terribly nervous." "My Billy used...
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101 Ways To Annoy People
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly. 2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." 3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to...
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Criminal Hall of Shame
Every day, we are assaulted by stories of stupid people -- many of whom use their stupidity for personal gain. From time to time, though, we hear of those...
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