Miscellaneous
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A doctor is making a routine call to one of his elderly patients. He asks, "And how are you doing today, Mr. Johnson?"Mr. Johnson replies, "I feel just fine,...
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Energizer Bunny
(AP) The Energizer Bunny, known best for "going and going and going..." passed away last evening at 12:42am.Upon completion of the autopsy early this...
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Voodoo Dick
Once upon a time, there once was a traveling salesman who's wife was a well known sex addict. But because the man could not be home all of the time, he often...
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Ways to tell someone they are goofy!
Politically Correct ways to tell someone they are goofy:A few clowns short of a circus. A few fries short of a happy meal. The wheel's spinning, but the...
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The Facts of Life:
THE FACTS OF LIFEThe 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. Money can't...
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A Cynics Guide to Life:
A Cynics Guide to Life:The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower...
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Penis holding
An old woman in a Nursing Home looks up one day to find an elderly man looking down on her. She smiled and asked him what he wanted."To get straight to the...
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Pocket Drinker
A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket,...
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