Miscellaneous

Auto Light

A doctor is making a routine call to one of his elderly patients. He asks, "And how are you doing today, Mr. Johnson?"Mr. Johnson replies, "I feel just fine,...

 

TV Rubbish

I absolutley hate sex on the television.....I keep falling off!

 

Energizer Bunny

(AP) The Energizer Bunny, known best for "going and going and going..." passed away last evening at 12:42am.Upon completion of the autopsy early this...

 

Voodoo Dick

Once upon a time, there once was a traveling salesman who's wife was a well known sex addict. But because the man could not be home all of the time, he often...

 

Ways to tell someone they are goofy!

Politically Correct ways to tell someone they are goofy:A few clowns short of a circus. A few fries short of a happy meal. The wheel's spinning, but the...

 

The Facts of Life:

THE FACTS OF LIFEThe 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. Money can't...

 

A Cynics Guide to Life:

A Cynics Guide to Life:The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower...

 

Penis holding

An old woman in a Nursing Home looks up one day to find an elderly man looking down on her. She smiled and asked him what he wanted."To get straight to the...

 

Pool table

Your mama is like a pool table, 25 cents and she'll rack your balls.

 

Pocket Drinker

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket,...