Miscellaneous
Scottish Builder
A Scottish old timer in Scotland, in a bar, talking to a young man.Old Man speaks; "Lad, look out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well...
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Things You Don't Want To Hear
Things you don't want to hear during surgery:Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop"Accept this...
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Star Wars Update Changes
Top Ten Changes to the new Star Wars update#10 Tie fighters replaced with black UN helicopters lead by Buotros Buotros Vader.#9 Sand People replaced by...
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Only A Head
Nine months to the day following their wedding, the Coopers had a baby. Unfortunately, it was born without arms or legs -- without even a torso. It was just...
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Blind Herbie
Little Herbie had been blind since birth. One day at bedtime, his mother told him that the next day was a very special one. If he prayed extra hard, he'd be...
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Went Fishing, Got Caught
A man phones home from his office and tells his wife: "Something has just come up. I have a chance to go fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a...
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Timbucktoo
It seems that two of the great Romantic British Poets, Shelly and Keats died on the same day.When they got to heaven St. Peter said, "I'm sorry, but I only...
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Shipwrecked Saga -Dog and Man
A man and his dog are shipwrecked on a desert island. After exploring the island, he discovers that the only other inhabitants on the island are a flock of...
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The Bobbit Hillbillies
Sung to the tune of "The Beverly Hillbillies"Come and listen to my story 'bout a man named John,A poor ex-marine with little fraction gone,It seems one night...
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Rejected Greeting Card Sentiments
GREETING CARDS UNSUCCESSFULLY MARKETED BY HALLMARK1. Happy Vasectomy! Hope you feel zippy! 'Cause when I got one... I got real snippy.2. I heard you had...
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