Relationships
A bad habit
I overheard a friend telling his pal, "I can't break my wife of the habit of staying up until 5 in the morning.""What is she doing?", the pal asks."Waiting...
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Where am I, Cathy?
Attorney to witness: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?"Witness: "Where am I Cathy?"Attorney: "And why did that...
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A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife...
A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife. He says to the doctor, "Doctor, I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first...
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A husband and wife were in their back yard...
A husband and wife were in their back yard, and he was noticing herexpanding backside. He commented, "Boy, your ass is getting big.almost asbig as the gas...
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A technical bastard
A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught ajudge just as he was about to leave, and asked him to marry them. Heasked if they had...
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A little kid comes running into the backyard...
A little kid comes running into the backyard.He says, "Pop! Pop! Ma just got hit by a bus!""Son, you know my lips are chapped. Please don't make me smile."
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Being hurt
A husband and wife went to the fairgrounds. The wife wanted to go on theFerris wheel, but the husband wasn't comfortable with that. So the wifewent on the...
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A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts...
A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in themirror. He asks, "What are you doing?"She replies, "I went to the doctor today, and...
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Two men are discussing their lives...
Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I'm getting married.I'm tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes towear."The other one says,...
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A bum asks a man for $2...
A bum asks a man for $2.The man asked, "Will you buy booze?"The bum said, "No."The man asked, "Will you gamble it away?"The bum said, "No."Then the man...
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