Doctor Jokes

Jelly

I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So how?s your breakfast this morning?" "It?s very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can?t seem to get...

 

College

It is recounted that at King?s College in the Strand around the time of the war, the Chief of Services would inevitably begin the year?s rounds by teaching...

 

Why did the nurse go to art school?

Why did the nurse go to art school?Answer: To learn how to draw blood!

 

Doctor's Notes 1

A man comes into the ER and yells; "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and...

 

Doctor's Notes 2

At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. "Big breaths," I instructed. "Yes,...

 

Doctor's Notes 3

One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I...

 

Doctor's Notes 4

I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, "Cover your right eye with...

 

Doctor's Notes 5

While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long have you been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered... "Why,...

 

Doctor's Notes 6

I was caring for a woman and asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the...

 

Doctor's Notes 7

A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing...