Miscellaneous
Resume Bloopers
REASONS FOR LEAVING THE LAST JOB:--Responsibility makes me nervous.--They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning.Couldn't work under...
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Physiotherapist and the Golfer
A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed-off and watched in horror as the ball headed directly toward a...
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Alligator and a Bet
A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar and turns to the astonished patrons."I'll make you a deal. I'll...
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Dumb Funnies!
What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.Why was the Tomato blushing? Because he saw the salad dressing. A termite walks into a barroom and asks, "Is the...
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Cannibals and Missionaries
Two cannibals meet one day...The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've...
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Star Wars- Sexually Explicit Lines
10. "Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!"9. "Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?"8. "Put that thing...
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The cashier
Well, one day, an idiot looking for a job finally came across a cigarette stand that was accepting anyone as there cashier. After being turned down for every...
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RELATIVES-(Classic Poem)
Many many years ago when I was twenty three,I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be.This widow had a grown-up daughterWho had hair of red.My...
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Custer's Last Thoughts
The curator of an art gallery asked an artist for a painting depicting General Custer's last thoughts.Two weeks later, the artist unveiled the painting, an...
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More Hose
A man who worked for a fire company came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station. Bell 1 rings...
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