Miscellaneous

Confucious say: Man who go to bed.......

Confucious say:Man who go to bed with itchy ass, wake up with smelly finger.

 

Elton John

Why did Elton John wear a nicotine patch on his penis?Because he was trying to cut down to one fag a day!

 

Out of bounds.

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules:"The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male...

 

Sheep

You momma is so fat, she needs a sheep for a tampon!

 

Doctor! Doctor!

A woman goes to the doctor's and says, "Doctor, Doctor, you have to help me. Every time I go to the bathroom, DIMES come out!"The doctor tells her to relax,...

 

You Know You're in New York City When...

You Know You're in New York City When...1. Nuns walk down the street carrying automatic weapons.2. You can run into the corner deli and have an eat-in lunch...

 

Cheerleaders

Whats the most embrassing thing for a cheerleader?When she does the splits and 8 class rings fall out!

 

ABC's

Student: Can I use the bathroom?Teacher: Okay but first say your ABC's.Students: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNO QRSTUVWXYZTeacher: Where's the P?Student: Its running down...

 

Who needs women

A man walks into the bar and orders 2 shots of whiskey and the man drinks one and pours the other shot in his hand, the man did this 3 times before the...

 

Black minister...

What do u call a black priest?Holy shit!!