Miscellaneous
Food for Thought
Patient: Doctor, you've gotta help me. I eat apples, apples later come out into the toilet. I eat bananas, bananas come out."Doctor: That's easy. Eat shit!
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Many Bones
Doctor: Did you know that there are more than 1,000 bones in the human body?Tom: Shhh, doctor! My dog's outside in the waiting room!
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Stirring Prescription
Patient: Doctor, what I need is something to stir me up; something to put me in a fighting mood. Did you put something like that in this prescription?Doctor:...
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New Treasury Bonds
The U.S. Treasury has just announced that it will sell three new types of bonds:1. The Al Gore bond, which has no interest.2. The Monica Lewinsky bond, which...
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Panic
Mrs. Smith: Help me, doctor! Little Tommy's swallowed the can-opener!Doctor: Don't panic. He'll be alright.Mrs. Smith: But how do I open the friggin beans,...
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Can\\\'t Hear
Doctor: What seems to be the trouble? Patient: Doctor, I keep getting the feeling that nobody can hear what I say. Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?
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Is It Serious?
Patient: Tell me, doctor. Is it serious? Doctor: Well, I wouldn't advise you to start watching any serials on TV.
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Get a Life
Patient: Doctor, I have a problem. I feel unhealthy and depressed. Doctor: You should cut down on drinks. Patient: I don't touch a drop.Doctor: You should...
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Good Sneeze!
Patient: Doctor, ya gotta help me. Every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm. Doctor: Really! What are you taking for it? Patient (with a grin): Black pepper!
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