Miscellaneous
How did you know?
A guy goes into a supermarket and buys: * one tin of beans * one bag of chips * one pack of burgers * one tub of ice cream * one cake * one case of beer *...
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Random Thoughts
Random Thoughts:When I die I want to go peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather; not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.I always try...
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The Psychiatric Hotline
"Hello, welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline."If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to...
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Psychiatric Christmas Carols
Schizophrenia -- Do You Hear What I Hear?Multiple Personality -- We Three Queens Disoriented AreDementia -- I Think I'll Be Home For ChristmasNarcissistic --...
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Viagra alert!
A supply of Viagra was stolen last night, police are looking for two hardened criminals and they can expect stiff sentences when caught!
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The Suicide
There was a blonde and a brunette watching the 10:00 news. A news reporter was in the foreground, giving a report. In the background there was a man and a...
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Pushing it!
Q: Why do so many Polish navy personnel drown? A: Because when the engine stops, they all have to get out and push!
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Little Bastard
Guy walks into the bar, goes up to the bartender. Reaching into his pants pocket, he pulls out a hundred dollar bill. "Set up everybody in the place!" he...
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Honeymoon Over
Bridegroom: "Dear, we've been back from the Caribbean for a month now. We've been in our apartment now for nearly a month. Isn't it time we were...
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Three mistresses
There is is this guy and he has three mistresses. Well, he decides that he only wants to have one, so he has to choose. He decides on a way to choose by...
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