More Jokes

Bed jokes

A little boy came downstairs crying late one night. "What's wrong?" asked his mother. "Do people really come from dust, like they said in church?"...

 

Bed jokes

Two friends who lived in the town were chatting. "I've just bought a pig," said the first. "But where will you keep it?" said the second. "Your...

 

Bed jokes

When Mr Maxwell's wife left him, he couldn't sleep. Why was that? She had taken the bed.

 

Bed jokes

Why did the composer spend all his time in bed? He wrote sheet music.

 

Bed jokes

I don't think my Mom knows much about children. Why do you say that? Because she always puts me to bed when I'm wide awake, and gets me up when I'm...

 

Bed jokes

I was once in a play called Breakfast In Bed. Did you have a big role? No, just toast and marmalade.

 

Bed jokes

Did you hear about the granny who plugged her electric blanket into the toaster by mistake? She spent the night popping out of bed.

 

Bed jokes

What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on? Cot-on-wool.

 

Bed jokes

You can't have any more chocolates tonight. It's not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach. Oh, Mum. I promise I'll lay on my side.

 

Bed jokes

I'd like to buy a bed, please. Certainly, madam. Spring mattress? Oh, no! I want to be able to use it all year.