Miscellaneous

Lawyers

A man calls his lawyers office. When the receptionist answers the phone he asks to speak to Mr. Taylor, his lawyer.The receptionist replies, "I'm sorry, but...

 

Snail\'s Pace

A man hears a knock at his door, opens it but doesn't see anyone.He glances down, sees a snail there and being the conscientious gardener he is, tosses the...

 

Words From Famous Women

Words From Famous Women ... "I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb...and I also know that I'm not blonde." - Dolly Parton...

 

Women\'s Snappy Comebacks

Women's Snappy Comebacks:Man: ="Haven't we met before?" Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."Man: ="Haven't I seen you someplace before?...

 

Great Female Comebacks

Man: "Haven't we met before?"Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't...

 

The Punk and the Old Fart

There was an old man in a bar who was staring at a punk in the corner. The punk had multicolored, spiked hair and multicolored feather earings.After a while...

 

Wife\'s Operation

I was in las Vegas, when a man walked up to me and "sir do you have a extra $20.00, my wife needs an operation that costs $1000.00. I have $980.00 and just...

 

Computerized Payroll (Y2K)

January 1, 2000Dear (enter employee name here)Re: Vacation PayOur records indicate that you have not used any vacation time over the past 100 year(s). As I'm...

 

Viagra

I took one of those viagra tablets the other day, it got stuck in my throat and I had a stiff neck for about eight hours!

 

Clinton strikes out.

Clinton and Gore went to a diner to get a bite to eat.A good looking waitress comes up and asks, "Can I take your order?"Clinton says, "Yes, I like a...